Do I dare admit

Do I dare admit,
in some ways I have always been wrong.
Off course....
for years I was waiting for something more.
Now here I am, daydreaming
As I often do ....
this person might just be perfect.
Yes, perfect.
Is it wrong to admit I get scared.
Scared of letting someone so close that I could break in thirds or fourths.
It makes my heart race...
I want to hide from it when my sister confirms just how perfect.
I spent so much time running.
It didnt matter where or for how long.
I have already been broken in two
It wasn't me, as much as my expectations....
But he was there, always there.
He would listen and he waited.
I don't know how he did it, I wasn't easy.
For once, my fear is intriguing ... exciting even.
Because I am understood.
Inspired and supported in a way I am not used too. 
The one thing that scares me the most, is the one person that can love me. 
That does love me ... always has.
The more I think about it, the more important it becomes.

Do I dare admit...
I might have finally figured it out.
But that doesn't mean I am not scared.
It doesn't make it easier.
Part of me wants to be this girl who can do it on her own.
I can do it.... 
The other wants to make a safe place for someone else. 
After a year and a half the battles over ...
My mind says "nothing ever really works"
Lets hope I am wrong. 
Because he is the only one, I feel like such a fool.  



this guy

I am certain mine is more handsome than yours....


autumn collapsed into winter

 We walk around our little corner of the world as much as possible.
All within a week autumn collapsed into winter.
One day we are enjoying all of autumns litter to find it buried in snow the following day.  
When they are gone for the weekend {as they often are} I find myself editing photos we have taken because I miss them so much.
I don't feel quite normal without our morning routine and even miss the "talking to the walls" at bed time.
It can be chaos but I love the consistency. I am always a little off without them.
"There are two things we should give to our children. One is roots, the other is wings" -

 {"mom I am making my cool face for you... to make your picture look good"}


leap frog and leaf angels

its the time of year, 
the one to remember and boast all the things you are grateful for.....
I know I have been a little busy and neglected this blog BUT .... 
I have a few post on the way. 
I don't need to say a lot ....
But I am grateful for these two. 
Their smiles and giggles. 
Their willingness to let me work long hours and not complain. 
For the little corner we call home and that, within each season it uncovers a new beauty to enjoy.
I am grateful they are mine because there is no way I could do what I do without these two.